by anonymous

I was driving in my car today thinking about the first time I heard "I love you" from my recent exes.

Here's how it went:

Darren told me he loved me outside an airport terminal when I was dropping him off to go to PA for 6 weeks. Totally worked -- after that I pined for him the whole time.

David first told me those three magic words after our fourth date. That was followed by, "I think you should move in with me." Yes, it was as crazy as it sounds and the relationship didn't last long. I loved that house though.

Andrew said it after it one night as we were falling asleep. I had given him 'oral sex' for the first time and as we were spooning, he whispered to me that he loved me. And you would be completely correct in assessing that he did not know the difference between real love and really good head.

The last ex told me at Guy's bar after we had just finished yet another martini and were outside smoking in a noisy crowd of people. I was so tipsy that I started crying and screaming at him, "I'm supposed to tell our children that you first told me you loved me when we were wasted one night at a bar?!" He ended up being an alcoholic and thank goodness those sloppy nights are behind me!

Gee, and why am I single now?!